Expectations vs. Reality.
I've really gotta learn to stop expecting so much.  Reality never aligns anyways.  I mean, I'm always going to be placed of less importance compared to others, it happens all the time, I mean, all people don't think like I do, no one holds the same values as I do.  We are all different, and for me, what's sad is that I cannot embrace that, accept it, and just let it go.

This europe trip has been without a doubt, lifechanging, inspiring, frustrating, and everything in between.  I've had lonely nights of reflection and catching up on hw, and nights of good craic, amazing company, and mediocre food (LOL).  There suddenly was a balance in my life.  For the record, That usually never happens.  It really has been the most eye-opening, beautiful experience I ever had the opportunity of participating in.

So when opportunity comes knocking on your door, I think it's best to answer it. Quickly.
That's the great thing about the future.  You can do all the planning you want (which is what I always did), but it's better and more fun to let it happen to you.  We are all destined to achieve something great in our lifetimes.

“But they weren’t the same. No one ever is when they’ve been tickled by first and fledging love.”

—	Greg Forrester, Sunday Afternoon Too simple, i miss last summer.

Final weeked, final reflections
Finally, finally, it is about time to return to the motherland.  As much as I have enjoyed my summer in Europe and how grateful I am towards my family, I would have rather spent a shorter time here but with a better QUALITY of an experience.  No, it wasn't a waste, but having second doubts on just about everything makes you wonder and think, maybe it just was NOT worth it.  Maybe, maybe not, who knows!  Anyways, it was weird thinking that for my high school years, I was trapped in the walnut bubble.  You see the same things, you don't think, you just do.  You don't care, you just accept it.  And then came college.  My first year was one of the most amazing defining moments of my life.  With all the craziness and little things in between, I thought, woahhh I see the world, it's pretty messed up but beautiful at the same time.  Boy, was I wrong.  European summer.  Now that's when you've seen it all.  I've taken in all of the sights, the sounds, the smells.  Met some of the most amazing people, met some of the most diverse people, and sadly metsome of the most disappointing people.
For me, my life is an accumulation of disappointments.  My expectations are always too high, so of course in the end, I think WHY? and then i'm given the "you will see, meet, be forced to work with ALL kinds of people."And when some people say ALLLLL kinds, they really mean ALLLL kinds.  I think with all of my disappointments in freshman year ( trust me when i saw ALLL of my disappointments.  I really mean it when I saw ALLLLLL) this summer, I just wanted to get out of town, forget my year and start new.  But your past always follow you anyways.  What was I thinking when I thought I could easily escape this horrible chapter in my life?  What was I thinking???

And of course my summer turned to be a string of highs and lows.
London was possibly one of the highest of highs on this trip!  While there were some bumpy parts (ERR ALMOST MISSING MY FLIGHT) it was craziness to the extreme and I wouldn't take back one second of it! Not one!!
Went to trafalgar square! So much energy and climbed up to the lions statues and saw the official olympic countdown sign!!!  Of course some of the most magical sights of big ben and seeing the olympic team from czech republic!!! And watching men's cycling live! WOOHOOOO! London is magical. Too bad my camera was almost out of battery!  but a lowdown on the events:
Westminister abbey, buckingham palace, london eye, crossing the bridge!!!! Going to BT london live!!! watching the 4 x 100 relay. NOO USAA, but still 2nd place, whatevs, still amazing!! then more oxford circus shopping (didnt go crazy, thank goodness!), scone tasting, yummmmm!
I wish I could take back Madrid though.  For the price I paid, (quadruple my london airplane ticket) it was one of my stupider moments.
I tried my very hardest to be frugal. I ate minimum amounts of food, I really tried to refrain myself and asked myself the essential question: DO I NEED THIS?
Lol, anyways...

It's sad that I'm only learning about nutrition now.  I'm 18 and it's my major so therefore I'm finally learning about different vitamins, foods, exercise, the whole package.  Why couldn't we have a nutrition class in elementary school?  I guess we did, but it was just that food pyramid that no one really cares about anyways.  And in fact, it is outdated.

The Harvard Food Pyramid, a much better example lol

There really isn't anything quite like home.  And in this case, I'm referring to dublin.  It's like freshman year in college all over again, when you say the word "home", you're actually referring to your dorm room, lol.
Madrid, you are amazing, you are cruel, you are intense, you are merciless.  So many ups and downs.  Sick with a fever, sick with food poisoning, and I am still alive right now. Madrid, no self check in machines, a pain to get tax refund, unhelpful people?!  Been spoiled by the Dublin way of life. My immune system is weaksauce.  Madrid: the epitome of what Europe should look like.  Also one of the most inefficient countries that I have ever encountered.
Planning, researching, comparing.  It does come a long way, and Madrid, you're just too cruel.

Ireland: home, home, home.  I've definitely assimilated to life here and in 2 weeks, I'll be gone.
One whiff of the Irish air, and you just feel 200% better.

With my adventures in the amazing land of the green coming to an end in a few short weeks, I wish I had more time.  Time is of the essence.  I hear that, well time and time, again, and usually, I disregard it and find that phrase to be insignificant, but now, I know there is much truth to that statement.  It seemed weird to be living in a foreigncountry.  I knew I would assimilate to it easily, haha I didn't even have jetlag.  I just wanted to GO GO GO.  Time is limited.  I assimilated to college lifestyle, easy peasy.  How hard could Ireland be, especially since they speak English here anyways, and they are the country of the most friendly people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting.
But, I think the quick assimilation to the weather, the scenery, the pace of living, just came in stages for me.  There were no bumps in the road, just bogs.  Wetlands that were smooth, smushy, funny to step in, haha.  First, came the excitement, the thrills of being in a new place, marvelling at everything, the architecture, the food, the amazing apartment that I'm staying in, the thrills of being a foreigner, going out to a pub just to get a breath of fresh air, coming across strangers, sharing a nice conversation.  Moments like these you don't wana forget.  Then comes that stage of, you do not feel like you are living in a foreign country, it's almost like home to you.  Everything is a routine, you sometimesgot bored.  You didn't need to talk to your friends/family as much.  I got busy with homework and juggling an extra class, and busy just going out and living a Dubliner lifestyle.  Some nights were quiet, others were filled with laughter and good cheer.
Finally, finally, I am at the stage that I miss Berkeley.  It's not even my home,but it is my home away from home to me.  While biking in Phoenix park yesterday, I saw little Irish kids running around and playing with their families, and it just made me miss my nephews, who are little bundles of joy.  I miss the food, I miss the people, I miss just being home.  LA isn't really my home.  It's my hometown, but it's not my home.  It is like I went through reverse homesick, in which, I get homesick at the end of my journey.

How lucky I am to have had this opporunity.  Some said, I'd completely change as a person.  I don't change that easily.  I guess there are little nuances in my personality that have changed.  I've become even more open to spontaniety and living in the moment, not trying to plan every calculated move.  It's not healthy to control your life in every single aspect.  I'm just gonna let it be.
And this weekend, I'll be off to madrid!  Sunlight and tapas and lavapies, ole!

And yet a part of me, is still longing to go back to berkeley.

It's in the subtle differences that makes everything so much lively.  Today, we went to The Coombe today, and finally I felt more like home.  It reminded me so much of Berkeley.  That easygoing lfiestyle, that also has a hint of danger or out of placeness.  That sort of lost feeling you get when you stay at Berkeley for too long. You think to yourself, why am I here, or what the hell am I doing here?  It was definitely a stark contrast to my own view of Dublin.  I had always believed it to be this pristine city with much craic, beautiful shops, quaint cafes, lovely people.  But no, even in one expansive city, these little towns all have character.  They have flaws, real people live in them.  I guess I had this fantasy that Europe was just this heaven of historical places that are sacred and remain sacred and are "untouchable."  Stuff you admire, stuff you see on travel magazines and go like, omg I needa go here, but I mean, people live here, so it can't be vacation mode for everyone.

Today's trip to the Coombe totally reminded me of the reasons I absolutely CANNOT CANNOT be a doctor.  I can't deal with blood and stick needles into children's veins LOL if that makes sense.  It was refreshing to see the little kids go in for blood tests.  Some were absolutely terrified and started crying so the doctor rubbed some cream and said it would numb it so they wouldn't feel anything.. Maybe it was a placebo effect, not entirely sure, Lol, but some kids were so calm and looked directly at the needle being poked into their veins.  it was amazing how calm they were!!! Anyways, it totally brought back memories of being a kid, young and carefree, and I see these kids and it just makes me want to reach my goals even more.  I want to help kids make healthy lifestyle hcoices, make them see what great things eating healthy and exercising and such and how they can go a long way in not only prolonging life, but improving the quality of life.  And to take control of their life, and make them understnd they have the choice to make that can make or break their futures. :)

Oh ireland, another weekend, hopefully wicklow this weekend

Biking in Phoenix Park, expansive lands of just green, green, and more green.
I appreciate this kind of life here.  It's not country hillbilly time, it's getting down to the roots of human communication, just talking.  Talking about this, talking about the weather, about the future, hopes for humanity, talking about food, talking about accents, just anything, and sometimes with complete strangers.

And always thinking, this would never have happened in America.
I embrace life here.  I just want to stay in this one moment for just a little longer.
Just gonna let it be.  Live each day as it comes.

A most memorable weekend.
Galway, the boys, the booze, the fresh air, the green, and the greener.
I could just die there.
And as quoted by my cousin "Irish men just don'tage well."  HA!
First rainy day visiting kylemore abbey.  Brilliant, i tell you, even in the rain.  The fresh smells of rain on the green grasses, the victoria gardens doted with that naturey smell of rawness
Ze nightclub was the most memorable aspect.  Irish guys just have that undeniable charm, they know how to talk, how to mingle, to seduce you.  And most of all, they were gentle.  Not much grinding, more sweet words, and they actually introduced themselves.  And then they whisper sweet nothings in your ear. Ugh, unbelievable.
Even today just wandering around the Temple Bar area, two men approach us, "Wow I just love your american accent"  We were so taken back and we were like uhh thanks?  And they wanted to buy us drinks but we insisted the eurocup match was important and that they'd better get back to it. Haha. ;)
Cliffs of Mohr was breath-taking.  Nature, green, what could go wrong?

1 week of work complete, and 6 more to go, woohoo!
So work has made me realize how much I enjoy the research perspective because it's all about the education of the masses, reaching directly out to the people.  With research, I hope to in the future connect with people and make sure everyone knows the many benefits of stayin healthy and fit as well as the disadvantages of being overweight.
Today in journal club we talked about the stigmas of being overweight.  No, it's not just the physical pain, but some people have psychological disorders and have attempted suicide as a result of obesity.  You know obesity brings up some very strong emotions.
And I see a  brighter future for the well-being of theplanet.  Surprisingly enough, obesity will be a bigger problem than overpopulation in the future.  So is it easier to try to educate the whole of society to try to stop discriminating against more copious people or trying to change the attitude of those who are obese.  Ehh, I guess there really is no correct answer to this, but it seems to be changing the perspective and mindset of those who are obese would be the best thing to do.
But isn't it sad when you think about the fact that these obese people who are trying to lose weight, maybe it's hard for them because they know that society judges.

So obesity is not just the science of things, but also the psychological and social science of this.  And beneath that lies this economic theory of consumer's choices and why people choose to eat what they eat.  The nutrigenomics aspect also plays a huge role.  I think I want to go into that a little more.  Adventure really is out there!

And the other story, of as quoted by my co-workers "Many people think that if you are skinny, then you're grand!"  Haha people say "grand" here too much.  It's their equivalent of "good" or "cool."

I hope one daymy scientific studies can affect people positively.  Oh the joys of being a nutritional sciences major, wootwoot :)

Onto galway tomorrow!!

Ze Future.   That is what I think about constantly. 
What made my day today was reading on flipboard that the obesity problem may be an even bigger problem than overpopulation.  Woweee, can you imagine that?  First days of work.  Very chill, relaxed atmosphere.  Still looking for that good ole Irish slaggin', but everyone just seems way too nice in the office.  First impressions: Reminds me of last summer in a way.  Everyone's doing their own thing.  I wish there was more human interaction.  I wish I was discovering something new, but hopefully along the way, this project will progress further and I'll be able to find some things of my own, go out to the hospitals.  I just got to be patient first.  Learn the ropes first, and be happy that I have this amazing opportunity.  But first, I have a lot of reading to do.  I went home with this blue packet full of public health information. wahoo!!

I'm very happy that I've narrowed down my interest of study.  Research is definitely something I want to do on the side, but I'm  not completely sure yet!  Just not all research all the time.  I want to teach and do something in academia!!!  Inspire young minds, give talks, present at conventions my findings and such, and just educate people on obesity.  Everything is just so fascinating about it. Doctors may be the frontier of the medical world, but in the long run, taking care of your own health is way more empowering than taking a bunch of meds.  "Let food be thy medicine" said the great Hippocrates.

"The Dr. of the future will no longer treat the human frame with drugs, but rather cure and prevent disease with nutrition" -Edison

"He that takes medicine and neglects his diet wastes the time of his doctor"
I've been thinking a lot about these quotes.  Edison, was a man ahead of his time.  So instead of addressing the problems we have in the present, isn't it wiser to address these problems before they even happen?  Being a part of this kind of movement would make my life.

I took notes on it at work today while reading about the Lifeways project hehehe.
The missions of the Lifeways project is to
record physical and psychological health status of socio-economic circumstances of individuals at birth, early childhood,early adulthood
and to follow them prospectively to measure changing health status over the 5 year period and see extent to which health status relates to social circumstances.

Interestingly enough, those individuals with poorer subjective health are significantly less likely to vote in a General election.  However, those with poor health and are dissatisfied with health service are more likely to vote.

I want to reflect more on this: WEIGHT STIGMA, threatening the psychological and physical health of obese individual.

Tomorrow will be another day of work! Hopefully more interesting than today

First clubbing experience was definitely an anticlimatic. And it's all my fault for being 18. How are all of the clubs here 21+? So we resorted to eating hamburgers and going back to watch angus thongs and perfect snogging. ohh aaron johnson, swooooon..  On a side note, it was really fun to see people drunk at 2 in the morning on grafton street riding those carriage carts mooning people.  Grafton Street really is this whole new world at night.  It was a 360 degree turn from morning to nighht.  Good stuff!!

going to bed now. sunrise 4 am. birds chirping. thats wsup

Dublin is amazing.  The sights, the people, the conversations.
Basically, the agenda for most days is go to work/talk talk talk/go to a pub, drink/talk talk talk/take bus home/talk talk talk/go to sleep.  check e-mail repeat.
Went to The Brazen Head and got to hear Irish storytelling and Irish music.  Wow, I hope the fairies don't get me!  After listening to the stories, I found interesting parallels between the Irish and the Jewish identities.  They both can be associated with the Diaspora movement.  They were both kind of neglected and discriminated against and thus were forced to emigrate to the States, and that being the reason they are found all over the world today.  And the people in Ireland, not all are pure Irish anyways!  And stories are often passed down via oral tradition, in a similar fashion to most cultures out there, and of course the same KINDS of stories are being told, because they are after all, timeless.  What I appreciated the most was the fact the the Irish, like the Jewish heavily depend on music as a way to express their deep culture.  Music has influenced, shaped, ripped apart my life in so many ways, and to be able to study and live and experience a culture that is foreign to me, but realize the many similarities between cultures that I am already familiar with, you realize, the world really isn't that different.  Like here at berkeley, we encourage diversity and say ohh the university is so diverse and people are very tolerant, but here's another way of looking at it.  People are people.  There are no differences amongst them, race, religion, upbringing.  We are not that diverse.  We are probably more similar than different anyways!

The food is amazing.  It's not so much special, but stuff here tastes different!  Ie. the lettuce, the ketchup, the mayo, even orange marmalade!  Cool stuff, dublin. I don't want to leave.  And time to plan for weekend adventures, yesssss

Temple bar!! spent 8 euros on one drink, not even kidding but I love that atmosphere of the bar!  It was so much fun listening to live irhs music and everyone clapping along and having this jolly good ole time!! Uplifting is what it is! amazing stuff!!  Then passing by the temple bar area district, we heard a band play The Killer's "Mr. Brightside" and the singer replaced "Kiss" with "blowjob."  No shame, no shame.  I love this nightlife!  It truly is one amazing historically rich city.

I had my interview today with Dr. McKenzie today.  Nutrition is definitely the way to go.  Good news is that I may be working on this project called Lifeways funded by UCD, following childhood obesity, esp concerning unborn babies.  I want to move away from the "lab experience" that I could have in SF.  I need this change.  While the public health lab is more hypothetical and data-infused without having more clear parameters, and structure, I feel this will be good for me.  But it's kind of scary to change into this path that you do not know what's going to happen.  I think this is what Dr. McKenzie meant about uneasiness and shock of doing something that is unfamiliar.  I think I kind of half-expected to come here doing something similar to what I could be doing at home, like in UCSF, but I feel I cannot get this kind of opportunity working in SF, so since I am abroad, might as well do something different.  I've been contemplating on changing career paths, and wondering if anything links together, like pharmacy and nutrition.  I feel they cannot coexist together.  And I've been asking my friends about it.  While they serve different purposes, I feel maybe they're like oranges and apples.  They cannot be compared in fact.

What is this fascination with nutrition that I am having all of the sudden?

I Always thought i wanted wanted to be a pharmacist stepping into my fathers shoes.k i loved the community atmosphere and the orderliness of the pharmacy but i could not see myself behind the counter. I was debating on doing clinical pharmacy and research so i went to sf. I liked lab work but i hope one day to earn my ph.d and spread knowledge to students because i always admited academia and i find treaching fulfilling

I studied nutrition because after watching many documentaries about the obesity of america i wanted to partake in that industry and positively affect the lifestyle choices people make. I was also influenced by metely looking at the nutrition facts my college provided. I was surprised by the amount of cholesterol and sodium us college students were ingesting and i was intrigued to find out that school provided lunches stemmed from early childhood elementary school lunches that were pretty horrible. After expressing my concerns with the culinary team they did not do much to address my concerns so i realize it is hardfor a voice of one student to change the lifestyle of many students.

Before in a school film commercial i was asked do you prefer coke or pepsi and i flat out said. It doesnt matter to me. We are college students. We do not care what we eat! Who knew i would regret what i had said earlier?

Day 1& 2 of Dublin has been amazing!
Got off the plane and first things I notice: SHADES OF GREEN, water, cute houses that were compartmentalized. Got thru customs in a breeze, seems like they don't care that I am a foreigner lol!  Took a taxi to UCD and unpack everything.  Amazed at how clean the air is and notice how amazing my apartment is! Private room with a private bathroom!  The Irish know how to live, seriously!  Go down to Grafton Street, but everything is closed :( Saw the Irish cheer on their country! Much nationalism here!! :)  So we decide to go to the pub to experience this amazing moment!  First pub we go to, we awkwardly sit there waiting to be served dinner, but of course no one really serves dinner....... HAHAHA they just drink.  You really cannot outdrink the Irish so then we awkwardly leave.  Go to next pub, Sheehan's!  Order some irish beef pie. YUMM!  Ordered...er water.. LOL saw the Irish cheer on their country!  Singing come on lads of greeen.  Hearing the curse is the funniest thing ever!  FECKIN REFEREEE!!  OIRELAND, C'MON!!!  Watch everyone drink while we're eating our stew and pie HAHAHA.

Today, got thru orientation ate at pasta fresca's! SOO GOOD the hummus and bread and the fettucine alfredo, but of course I cannot finish anything!  Haha go grocery shopping at dunne's.  Got everything on sale. LOL. groceries are priceyy!  So glad I brought instant oatmeal, tea, and granola bars cause that's all i eat!  A memorable two days so far!  I want to go to Taste of Dublin but it seems like it is going to be rained out this weeked.  And so tomorrow begins more internship orientation.  I JUST WANNA start my internship already!!  Wheeeeee

First stop: Toronto, Canada
Already this culture shock.  More like ethnicity shock.  Moving away from that asian bubble i guess, i excited!! It's 8 PM here and the sun hasnt even started to set.  This is wonderful, more light the better!! exciting! :)  and I totally made good use of my le francais speaking to some adorable old grandmothers and grandfathers!  All I could do was to ask them simple questions like ar eyou traveling for vacation??  So funny their responses and when i looked at them perplexed, I was hesitant to say anything and just tried blurting out bits and pieces of French that I knew, for example, ROUGE!
Haha so fun!  They say ca va and ooh la la a lot! J'aime beacoup!  Le hot dogg!!!

And tomorrow begins my long awaited trip to the land of the leprachauns. I'm scared, excited, and still in disbelief I am given to opportunity to travel abroad.  I still cannot believe my parents are letting me explore the world.  I am so grateful for them as well as the rest of my family.  This year would not have been possible without their guiding light.  I'm going to write here everyday.  First goal.
Second goal: Properly budget money!  Don't buy unnecessary stuff
Cook some good stuff!
Meet and be friends with the locals as well as co-workers!
Take a risk
Take more pictures!!
Travel inside/outside of Ireland
Live in the moment.