Final weeked, final reflections
Finally, finally, it is about time to return to the motherland.  As much as I have enjoyed my summer in Europe and how grateful I am towards my family, I would have rather spent a shorter time here but with a better QUALITY of an experience.  No, it wasn't a waste, but having second doubts on just about everything makes you wonder and think, maybe it just was NOT worth it.  Maybe, maybe not, who knows!  Anyways, it was weird thinking that for my high school years, I was trapped in the walnut bubble.  You see the same things, you don't think, you just do.  You don't care, you just accept it.  And then came college.  My first year was one of the most amazing defining moments of my life.  With all the craziness and little things in between, I thought, woahhh I see the world, it's pretty messed up but beautiful at the same time.  Boy, was I wrong.  European summer.  Now that's when you've seen it all.  I've taken in all of the sights, the sounds, the smells.  Met some of the most amazing people, met some of the most diverse people, and sadly metsome of the most disappointing people.
For me, my life is an accumulation of disappointments.  My expectations are always too high, so of course in the end, I think WHY? and then i'm given the "you will see, meet, be forced to work with ALL kinds of people."And when some people say ALLLLL kinds, they really mean ALLLL kinds.  I think with all of my disappointments in freshman year ( trust me when i saw ALLL of my disappointments.  I really mean it when I saw ALLLLLL) this summer, I just wanted to get out of town, forget my year and start new.  But your past always follow you anyways.  What was I thinking when I thought I could easily escape this horrible chapter in my life?  What was I thinking???

And of course my summer turned to be a string of highs and lows.
London was possibly one of the highest of highs on this trip!  While there were some bumpy parts (ERR ALMOST MISSING MY FLIGHT) it was craziness to the extreme and I wouldn't take back one second of it! Not one!!
Went to trafalgar square! So much energy and climbed up to the lions statues and saw the official olympic countdown sign!!!  Of course some of the most magical sights of big ben and seeing the olympic team from czech republic!!! And watching men's cycling live! WOOHOOOO! London is magical. Too bad my camera was almost out of battery!  but a lowdown on the events:
Westminister abbey, buckingham palace, london eye, crossing the bridge!!!! Going to BT london live!!! watching the 4 x 100 relay. NOO USAA, but still 2nd place, whatevs, still amazing!! then more oxford circus shopping (didnt go crazy, thank goodness!), scone tasting, yummmmm!
I wish I could take back Madrid though.  For the price I paid, (quadruple my london airplane ticket) it was one of my stupider moments.
I tried my very hardest to be frugal. I ate minimum amounts of food, I really tried to refrain myself and asked myself the essential question: DO I NEED THIS?
Lol, anyways...

It's sad that I'm only learning about nutrition now.  I'm 18 and it's my major so therefore I'm finally learning about different vitamins, foods, exercise, the whole package.  Why couldn't we have a nutrition class in elementary school?  I guess we did, but it was just that food pyramid that no one really cares about anyways.  And in fact, it is outdated.

The Harvard Food Pyramid, a much better example lol

There really isn't anything quite like home.  And in this case, I'm referring to dublin.  It's like freshman year in college all over again, when you say the word "home", you're actually referring to your dorm room, lol.
Madrid, you are amazing, you are cruel, you are intense, you are merciless.  So many ups and downs.  Sick with a fever, sick with food poisoning, and I am still alive right now. Madrid, no self check in machines, a pain to get tax refund, unhelpful people?!  Been spoiled by the Dublin way of life. My immune system is weaksauce.  Madrid: the epitome of what Europe should look like.  Also one of the most inefficient countries that I have ever encountered.
Planning, researching, comparing.  It does come a long way, and Madrid, you're just too cruel.

Ireland: home, home, home.  I've definitely assimilated to life here and in 2 weeks, I'll be gone.
One whiff of the Irish air, and you just feel 200% better.

With my adventures in the amazing land of the green coming to an end in a few short weeks, I wish I had more time.  Time is of the essence.  I hear that, well time and time, again, and usually, I disregard it and find that phrase to be insignificant, but now, I know there is much truth to that statement.  It seemed weird to be living in a foreigncountry.  I knew I would assimilate to it easily, haha I didn't even have jetlag.  I just wanted to GO GO GO.  Time is limited.  I assimilated to college lifestyle, easy peasy.  How hard could Ireland be, especially since they speak English here anyways, and they are the country of the most friendly people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting.
But, I think the quick assimilation to the weather, the scenery, the pace of living, just came in stages for me.  There were no bumps in the road, just bogs.  Wetlands that were smooth, smushy, funny to step in, haha.  First, came the excitement, the thrills of being in a new place, marvelling at everything, the architecture, the food, the amazing apartment that I'm staying in, the thrills of being a foreigner, going out to a pub just to get a breath of fresh air, coming across strangers, sharing a nice conversation.  Moments like these you don't wana forget.  Then comes that stage of, you do not feel like you are living in a foreign country, it's almost like home to you.  Everything is a routine, you sometimesgot bored.  You didn't need to talk to your friends/family as much.  I got busy with homework and juggling an extra class, and busy just going out and living a Dubliner lifestyle.  Some nights were quiet, others were filled with laughter and good cheer.
Finally, finally, I am at the stage that I miss Berkeley.  It's not even my home,but it is my home away from home to me.  While biking in Phoenix park yesterday, I saw little Irish kids running around and playing with their families, and it just made me miss my nephews, who are little bundles of joy.  I miss the food, I miss the people, I miss just being home.  LA isn't really my home.  It's my hometown, but it's not my home.  It is like I went through reverse homesick, in which, I get homesick at the end of my journey.

How lucky I am to have had this opporunity.  Some said, I'd completely change as a person.  I don't change that easily.  I guess there are little nuances in my personality that have changed.  I've become even more open to spontaniety and living in the moment, not trying to plan every calculated move.  It's not healthy to control your life in every single aspect.  I'm just gonna let it be.
And this weekend, I'll be off to madrid!  Sunlight and tapas and lavapies, ole!

And yet a part of me, is still longing to go back to berkeley.

It's in the subtle differences that makes everything so much lively.  Today, we went to The Coombe today, and finally I felt more like home.  It reminded me so much of Berkeley.  That easygoing lfiestyle, that also has a hint of danger or out of placeness.  That sort of lost feeling you get when you stay at Berkeley for too long. You think to yourself, why am I here, or what the hell am I doing here?  It was definitely a stark contrast to my own view of Dublin.  I had always believed it to be this pristine city with much craic, beautiful shops, quaint cafes, lovely people.  But no, even in one expansive city, these little towns all have character.  They have flaws, real people live in them.  I guess I had this fantasy that Europe was just this heaven of historical places that are sacred and remain sacred and are "untouchable."  Stuff you admire, stuff you see on travel magazines and go like, omg I needa go here, but I mean, people live here, so it can't be vacation mode for everyone.

Today's trip to the Coombe totally reminded me of the reasons I absolutely CANNOT CANNOT be a doctor.  I can't deal with blood and stick needles into children's veins LOL if that makes sense.  It was refreshing to see the little kids go in for blood tests.  Some were absolutely terrified and started crying so the doctor rubbed some cream and said it would numb it so they wouldn't feel anything.. Maybe it was a placebo effect, not entirely sure, Lol, but some kids were so calm and looked directly at the needle being poked into their veins.  it was amazing how calm they were!!! Anyways, it totally brought back memories of being a kid, young and carefree, and I see these kids and it just makes me want to reach my goals even more.  I want to help kids make healthy lifestyle hcoices, make them see what great things eating healthy and exercising and such and how they can go a long way in not only prolonging life, but improving the quality of life.  And to take control of their life, and make them understnd they have the choice to make that can make or break their futures. :)

Oh ireland, another weekend, hopefully wicklow this weekend

Biking in Phoenix Park, expansive lands of just green, green, and more green.
I appreciate this kind of life here.  It's not country hillbilly time, it's getting down to the roots of human communication, just talking.  Talking about this, talking about the weather, about the future, hopes for humanity, talking about food, talking about accents, just anything, and sometimes with complete strangers.

And always thinking, this would never have happened in America.
I embrace life here.  I just want to stay in this one moment for just a little longer.
Just gonna let it be.  Live each day as it comes.